having to do a cofm project sucks. being in a group that chooses to have 900 people as a sample size makes it even worse. argh! and then there are some other groups who just seem to be having a holiday, arhh!! that just adds furthermore shit. but well, c’est la vie.

 

i’m going to be tied up with this project for virtually one whole week, everyday frm 3pm-930pm, going door-to-door at some random HDB block in clementi to interview pple for our cofm health survey study. how shitty! thought its gonna be a nice holiday away from the wards, turns out to be not-so-nice holiday after all.

 

which reminds me, yay! i’m going off to cambodia for a weekend jaunt next friday! finally decided to make a departure from the usual megacity holiday destination and embark on an exciting journey to a less developed country. hope it’ll be an eyeopener and everything since everyone who has been to cambodia/vietnam always gushes about how great the place is!

 

of course, some pple clearly have doubts about me being able to survive in cambodia, saying that i won’t be able to tahan the hardship and everything. ok, you say it once, hahaha, i laugh along with everyone. you say it twice, haha, i still laugh and try to play along. you say it thrice, the joke starts to get stale and honestly it is starting to be mildly irritating. you say it AGAIN and &*@^%#(^^@#?............ well, you get the picture.

 

i mean, maybe everyone has this perception of me being this big softie who can’t endure hardship and stuff. hello?! i also went through army shit right. ok, maybe not the whole deal since i disrupted, but at least i went thru bmt and half of ocs right? c’mon. give me some credit for that. personally, i see no point in roughing out unnecessarily since i’m now a civilian and not in the army serving NS. how i choose to go about during my holiday is really my own choice right? just because i choose not to stay in a US$1-a-night shithole with holes in the ceiling and mosquitoes buzzing around doesn’t make me less masculine just because some other guys can endure living in such unsanitary conditions. if you want to live on a US$2-a-day budget, c’mon man, it’s your own freaking choice. don’t make it the status quo for all guys who go backpacking to have to find the most dirt-cheap hostel to sleep in so you can be perceived as more ‘macho’ and wear that tag proudly on your chest. honestly. its not like you can bring all the money u save into the grave with you in the future right (and you can’t save much staying at US$1 hotels anyway).

 

it is quite irritating when others impose their own method of holidaying onto you when hey, i’m not asking you to come along and spend, say, oh, two more dollars a night with me in cambodia. then they go along and start saying i do this because ‘oh, zy is damn rich and can afford to spend’. wahlau. of course i got more money to spend la, the simple reason is cause i dun spend (note that i use the word spend and not waste, cause i think if the car is modded up pretty snazzily, it really is money well spent.) money souping up my car or wasting it all on booze (well, not anymore haha) la. this perception is quite unfair to me, really. just cause i choose to stay in a US$2 hotel, pple say i’m rich. but when someone else spends $500 modding his car, no one says anything. see? unfair right. just because i like spending money on myself, pple say i’m rich. argh! c’mon man, you guys have loads more money than me, just that you can’t touch that 6-figure deposit that you have squirrelled away in the bank! i have no such secret untouchable account to speak of (even though i really wish i had). and if you want to torture yourself by denying yourself good food and shopping while on holiday, it’s your own choice. i don’t go around saying that you are a miser just cause you don’t spend, so don’t keep tying everything together and making hasty generalizations about me.

 

really la, this has got to stop. enough questioning about my spending choices and tying the whole masculinity issue along with it. i work hard for my own spending money, and i think i am entitled to decide how i want to spend it. i didn’t actually intend to blog about this but it has been getting on my nerves of late and i’m just afraid i’d outburst at someone one day if i didn’t let off some steam regarding this irritating issue. ergh!